Cooking drunk is not a good idea for me. Dumped a whole bag of brown sugar out on the floor because I held it upside down not noticing it was open, and shrieked like I was being attacked when it fell. And not remembering where anything is in the kitchen or remembering the names of ingredients doesn’t help either.

thats-significantly-raven:

nohnoelle:

How To Train Your Humans

I’m obsessed with this

gay8:

riddle me this atheists: if god isn’t real then who is inside the kleenex box pushing up the next tissue

nnilkshake:

why test on animals when there r people who r rude to waiters

! ! ! !

dutchster:

when you have the hiccups while trying to sleep

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pale0zoic:

koripxo:

thatduck-sureisugly:

I DONT THINK IVE EVER LAUGHED THIS HARD IN MY LIFE

do white people even have responsibilities n shit like how the fuck do you have time to do this nonsense

THAT FUCKING COMMENT
“Do you think that your 16 year old daughter hasn’t masturbated already? Like, do you really think there’s anything in that scene that this chick hasn’t already tried when the lights go out at night, or in the bathroom, or in the tub, or with the shower head or something like that? I’m telling you, man, I’m not teaching this broad anything new. If I were to create a rating system, I wouldn’t even put murder right at the top of the chief offenses. I would put rape right at the top, and assault against women. Because it’s so insanely overused and insulting how much it’s overused in movies as a plot device, a woman in peril. That, to me, is offensive, yet that shit skates.”
Kevin Smith (director) on the ridiculousness of movies about sex receiving NC-17 ratings while extremely violent movies get by with R ratings. (via kevinnj)
kristoffbjorgman:

ouijasexting:

so no change

nedsseveredhead:

I feel so proud when friends tell me their parents like me. Like damn right they do, I am a delight.

! ! !
d0nn0:

i love Ellen Degeneres

daintychinaprincess:

urfbownd:

There should be a show just called “AU”

every single episode, a group of the same characters are in a different alternate universe with no explanation as to why.

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lasagnababy:

when rappers brag about being rich and breaking the law but then whine when people illegally download their music

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